Friday, 17 October 2008

Jamie's Weekly Sports Thought

Tim Shadbolt has written A Tale of Two Mayors. My literary offering is titled A Tale of Two Texters.

It came about because I was in Christchurch last Saturday supporting the Southland under-18 rugby team at the South Island tournament at Lincoln. A prior dinner booking with friends (made before the Air New Zealand Cup quarter-final draw) had to be honoured and meant relying upon text updates from Tauranga.

Having lost an expensive bottle of beverage to Graeme Smith (Chiefs board member and Ballance Agri-Nutrients GM of Sales and Marketing based in Mount Maunganui) in the Bay of Plenty round-robin clash, a return alcoholic wager was duly placed.

Like me, Lee Piper and Guy Taylor (CRT) had also suffered expensive losses to the cocky Smith and were confident the Stags would extract revenge and replenish our drinks cabinets.

Both Smith and Piper agreed to text updates. Suffice to say, they saw the game somewhat differently:

Smith (7:01pm) – Are you boys packing yourselves? Your team looks like they’ve already gone on the end of season trip today. Guess they have eh!!

Smith (8:07pm) – Due to unfortunate atmospheric conditions in the Bay of Plenty all mobile communication is suspended for the rest of the night. Unless things change of course.

Piper (8:15pm) – Still 14 to 8. [Player’s name - not publishable] is an idiot. 4 to go to half time.

Piper (8:20pm) – 21 to 8 to us. Half time.

Smith (8:21pm) – 21 to 8 to you at half time. We usually only have one half per game so it must be the second half tonight.

Piper (8:39pm) – King yellow carded. In some trouble on our own line. Still leading. Maybe not for long.

Piper (8:45pm) – 21 to 11. We infringing and been warned.

Smith (8:45pm) – 21 to 11. Use fullas are starting to cheat.

Piper (8:47pm) – And [expressive expletive] Walsh is killing us with his [expressive expletive] refereeing.

Smith (8:51pm) – 28 to 11 [expressive expletive].

Piper (8:56pm) - We up 28 to 11. Looking good. 17 to go.

Piper (8:58pm) - 35 to 11 to us with 15 to go.

Piper (9:01pm) – 38 to 11 … 13 to go.

Smith (9-04pm) - Yep, the top will be coming off your bottle just after we’ve finished Piper’s. Taylor’s after yours.

Piper (9:09pm) – 45 to 11 … we are killing them … 6 to go.

Smith (9:10pm) – 45 to 11. 6 to go. 5 quick tries under the posts and we’ll be right.

Smith (9:20pm) – Well done boys. I’m off to the bank for a loan.


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