Wednesday, 3 December 2008

Jamie's Weekly Sports Thought - 14/11

The cliché is the blight of the English language. Nowhere is this more evident than during an election campaign or on an All Black tour.

Some bright spark at Oxford University recently compiled a list of the 10 most irritating phrases in the English language. They are as follows:

1. At the end of the day.
2. Fairly unique.
3. I personally.
4. At this moment in time.
5. With all due respect.
6. Absolutely.
7. It's a nightmare.
8. Shouldn't of (instead of the grammatically correct shouldn’t have).
9. 24/7.
10. It's not rocket science.

With all due respect to Oxford University, I personally reckon they shouldn’t of left the list at just 10. At this moment in time there’s one cliché that’s absolutely a nightmare. It irritates me 24/7 and I know at the end of the day I’m not fairly unique in saying it’s not rocket science!

So surely, when it comes to irritating phrases, top of the pops belongs to “moving forward”. If I hear another moving forward from a politician or a rugby player or coach, I think I’ll move forward to the nearest high-rise window in Gore (there aren’t many to pick from) and jump!

I personally blame John Mitchell because he started it all. Mind you his predecessor Wayne Smith is not without blame either and you can see his unfortunate influence coming through in some of today’s All Blacks.

Liam Messam is a fine example. He got his All Black career off to a good start at Murrayfield then proceeded to confuse the hell out of us in his first after-match interview in the black jersey. He talked about how great it was to get out there and “express himself” (Colin Meads translation – get stuck in) and then he spoke of completing things “task by task” (Colin Meads translation – ruck the shi# out of the #astards).

Perhaps, though, the ‘full credit’ for clichés this week goes to the bouffant boofhead of the United Future party, Peter Dunne. When asked about his coalition talks with National he defiantly declared he’d go back and “talk to my people”. In a party of one that would make for an interesting conversation!


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